Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Ten Unknown Facts About Me

1.  I can't tolerate dishonesty.  It makes me go to a dark place in seconds. I learned in therapy what a trigger dishonesty is for me last year.  "Hit me with the truth, but never comfort me with a lie."

 2. I was feeling like I was going through a faith crisis. But now I'm beginning to believe Christ wants me to go in a different direction.  I don't believe God wants me to live in fear.  He doesn't want me to make decisions based on the belief I will go to hell if I do something wrong.  He wants me to make choices based on the belief that it's my free agency to do the right thing.  I refuse to make decisions based on fear any longer!

3. I am a flaky person. I will quickly agree to do things and then realize it's more than I can take on. I am really trying to change that about myself.

4. I care deeply. I am eager to help others because I want to love everyone and make everything better. It always hurts when I realize I can't fix it.

5. I'm really good at raising children. When that child reaches adulthood is where my parenting skills are lacking.  I am trying to figure out the adult child situation.

6. I used to not be able to say the words butt, bum, pee, and poop. My mom taught us those were bad words. I used to feel wicked if I said butt! She would say bottom, behind, wet, and stinky. I don't swear because that will always feel really naughty!

7. I have power of attorney for my mentally ill father who has Parkinson's and dementia. I struggle with feelings of anger, compassion, and grief towards him.

8. I know Christ wants me to be kind towards others before anything else. "Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." This is usually easy for me. But I hate to remind myself to show love when that school secretary is so rude whenever I have to go into the office. Sometimes kindness takes practice for me.

9. I miss my mom so much it can be physically painful.

10. I am Christian. I sin daily. I know I can do better tomorrow. I don't have to do everything perfectly today or know all the answers. He is waiting for me to get over myself and have peace.

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