Monday, January 31, 2011

Mark Twain....He Was Not A Blogger

Mark Twain wrote an autobiography to be released on the 100th anniversary of his death. An incredible writer penning his important views of life to be shared with the world after his absence of 100 years. This fact alone made me want to read the book. Many others had this same opinion because I was on the waiting list at the library for over 4 weeks. Three days ago it was my turn to check out this book. And here it is. All 736 pages! It's huge!! Let me demonstrate the size of this literature.

Next to an apple.

Next to my cell phone.

Next to a tampon.

Next to the cutest 4 year old evah!

Here's the real kicker. This is volume 1 of 3! Yes, there are 3 books to this autobiography. Which leads me to the conclusion that Mark had a lot to say, and he thought very highly of himself. Seriously, who could write 3 volumes about their life? If I wrote an autobiography it would be a pamphlet. A very small pamphlet used to wipe the noses of little children when their mothers can't find a kleenex in their purse. It is said that bloggers need to write short posts because the average time spent on a blog is 90 seconds. I don't think Mark would have made a successful blogger because I doubt he could write anything that could keep within that 90 second time frame. There is no question that good old Mark was an incredible writer for generations to come, but I can write a 90 second blog post.

I am disappointed that I will not be reading Twain's autobiography. Because one, the book needs to be returned to the library in less than 2 weeks. There will be no renewing of this book because the waiting list is so long. And two, whoever read this book before smoked and I can barely flip through the pages without gagging on stale cigarette smoke.

2 comments:

Kelsey said...

That is a giant book! And there are 3 of them? Oh boy.

Lacking Productivity said...

I've been wondering about this autobio...I can't tell yet if I am interested in reading it (perhaps I'll stick with the fabulous Ken Burns documentary on Twain).

The length is quite funny from a man who is well know for his quotes on being brief.

http://www.onlineuniversities.com/blog/2010/07/12-timeless-writing-tips-from-mark-twain/

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