Sunday, April 23, 2006

Real Simple

I love the magazine Real Simple I especially like this month's special issue. It's Real Simple Family. I like it because obviously I have a family, and I like to pretend that I make things simple.

There is an article called Winging It by Rob Keefe. My family is well traveled because we take our 3 kids, tie them down in our Durango, and make the 26 hour drive to visit family. Although it's insanity at it's finest, my children do amazingly well for this kind of journey. So when this article said "Sometimes the best way to travel with kids is to embrace the unexpected, welcome the inconvenience and remember the moving walkway," I was ready to embrace any tips for traveling. The first paragraph told of why children are dreaded travel partners because they don't like to wait in line. Yes, this is true.

The second paragraph starts, "Since my parents are a two-hour plane ride from us and we like to visit them several times a year, my five-year-old son and I are frequent travel partners." This is when I rolled my eyes, laughed, and flipped the page. I'm sorry Rob. I'm sure you're a very good father and a writer. But until you've taken a torteous 26 hour car ride with 3 kids under the age of 9, who don't want to touch each other, and have to go to the bathroom every 90 minutes, I don't think you're in the position to write an article about traveling with children. You just don't know.

And speaking of torturing children I have come up with the perfect device gauranteed to make your kids scream in terror. Yes, sometimes it's enjoyable to see your child's eyes fill with terror when they see this on the plate before them:I call it bean soup. After making it for 2 1/2 hours I took a look into my witch's pot and cackled, "There is no way they're eating it!" As predicted my children saw through my disguise as a mother and saw the true witch that I am. They didn't taste my brew and ate crackers instead. As for my husband he absolutely loves it, and me, warts and all!

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