Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Pornographic Cupcakes

Okay, it's getting too deep in here after my last post. So I'm going to lighten the mood and tell you about one of my most embarrassing moments as a mother. I served porn cupcakes at my 5 year old's birthday party. Yes I did!

At the time Cameron loved the show Bob the Builder. So I planned the entire birthday party around that theme. The party guests wore hard hats for their party hats. We played outdoor games involving dirt. They had a treasure hunt in soil. The pinata was shaped like a wrench.

I decided it would be really cute to make cupcakes that would look like dirt with worms coming out of it. Well, being the procrastinator that I am I didn't get all the supplies purchased in a timely manner. But have no fear, I have 5 Walmarts within 8 minutes of my home. So I zipped on over to one. Unfortunately there were no gummy worms to be found in the entire Walmart. It was like Bob himself showed up and purchased all the worms for his own party! I had to get home in order to get the cupcakes baked and finished in time! So, luckily, I found sour gummy worms. There were two problems with these worms. First of all, they were sour, and Cameron didn't like sour candy. The second problem was that they had two heads. They were just weird looking, but I was on a time crunch! (I tried to find a picture on the web, but I can't find any. Maybe they stopped making them because it is an ugly candy.)


So, I raced home and whipped up a nice batch of cupcakes. I started the decorating process and they were coming along very nicely. The final part was the actual placement of the worms. I wanted the worms to stand up so they would look like they were crawling out of the dirt. The problem was that the two heads made the worms top heavy, and the worm fell over. Well, I'm crafty, and I don't give up easily. So, I flipped the worms over so that they heads were on the bottom and the ends were sticking straight into the air. Problem solved! Let's party!


The party was going smoothly. I was the hostest with the mostest and leading the children in a game. I noticed my friend Michele and her husband Joe eyeing the cupcakes. Yeah, they looked yummy! And then they were laughing. Several other adults joined them and quiet laughter ensued. We're talking about the laughter you try to suppress but you just can't help yourself so you are shaking and your face is turning red sort of laughter. What is wrong with my Bob the Builder cupcakes? I made my way over to the adults who couldn't speak. They could only simply point at the worms with tears in their eyes. And that's when I saw it. I saw my cute cupcakes through the eyes of adults.


Two round balls at the bottom.
A long thin object protruding upwards.
(If you can't picture this certain male body part, I can't help you because I wish to keep this blog rated G!)


My face instantly grew a deep red. And then I was one of those adults who couldn't stop laughing! How could I have not seen that?!! What was I thinking! Thank goodness my children still have innocent minds and didn't see anything unusual about my Porn Cupcakes!

3 comments:

 Anonymous said...

I think you made them like that on purpose!Big Bro

 Anonymous said...

I think you made them like that on purpose!Big Bro

 Anonymous said...

I think you made them like that on purpose!Big Bro

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